Recent events (I shall refer to them as "obstacles") are sucking the enthusiasm out of me. I am a product of my choices, as in every decision made, has a result. The product to date isn't exactly something I am content with. However, I've tried to bottle that frustration up and use it as momentum for moving forward. It took me a long time to know that there is no profound destination where happiness will be sought, but rather a learning process of figuring out how to just ENJOY the journey and all the moments along the way. Nonetheless, there are days/nights where sometimes I can't suppress a small amount of doubt or a lack of hope or a feeling of just being somewhat lost. I know that I'll get where I want to go and despite it all, determination is not something I have ever lacked. However, I am just getting a little weary from always "trying" and not seeing the progress as a result. It's as though I am trying to swim across the ocean, but I can still see the shoreline; like I am working so hard, but not getting so far.
Patience patience patience. I have to remember to STOP. Count my blessings - as they are abundant. I am incredibly grateful.
It's just that there's so much more I want and I am patiently trying to be patient - tired of struggling so much. Life is for living. I want to embrace that, but not sure how to do that precisely for much longer when what I am after, is still out of my reach.
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