My sister told me about a 13 year old who committed suicide yesterday in her town. This is the second teenager I have heard of in high school in the past week.
My heart aches for these boys' family and friends. I can't even fathom the pain they are going thru.
And it is scary.
Just a reminder that every day we need to make sure those around us know they are loved and treasured. That we take the time to make our relationships a priority.
As I was visiting with a friend on the phone tonight, so often as a mother it's easy to say "later" when a child asks for you to show you something or to play a game. There's always something that needs to be done. But what if later never comes? I have got to get better at making the most of those moments.
My children are my life's greatest blessing. I need to ensure that I am giving them all that I have got to give.
Tonight Ava was talking about when she has kids, and how I'll be the grandma...and that she hopes I can visit on the weekends. But not during the weeks because she'll be busy with "meetings, classes, and homework." Running from one thing to the next is what defines me. My 5 year old even relates that to what a mom does because that's all she knows.
It's very hard not to want to throw in the towel on school and be a better mom. Yes, college will enable a better future for us. But money and a promotion may not be what I am seeking. More than anything, i just want to raise healthy, happy, well-rounded children. Figuring out how to do everything and be the best parent I can be is a challenge. I am going to work more towards truly treating each day as a GIFT as that is what it is. That includes stopping more for the moments that matter most, and not caring so much about the other stuff.
Eventually, it all has to fall into place...at some point anyway. I am getting there....slowly but surely.
uuuuuuuuuuuppppppppppppppdate
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